Ok so I was looking over my previous blog post before the pregnancy announcement...and dang I was in a bad place. But so much has changes since then. So let tell you...
I did go and seek professional help. I met with a wonderful counselor and we talked about my pain. I had worried myself into depression and had a little bit of a chemical imbalance. My counselor gave me some tips to work thru my anxiety. They totally work. I still find myself worrying over things I have no control of but I just talk myself down and its all good.
One of the biggest contributors to my self-loathing was I was miserable in my own skin. I was embarrassed by how I looked and it made it so I didn't want anyone to talk to me or know I was married to JD because I felt he deserved someone better looking. My health was in shambles. I had bad high blood pressure, was pre-diabetic and weighed close to 300lbs. It was horrible. So I emailed my doctor and asked her for advice. She suggested me taking a health education course thru Kaiser. It was awesome. I started feeling better about me right away. I was changing how we were eating and thinking about food. I lost 18lbs through out the course and at the end was recommended to have weight loss surgery... I already knew I wanted it from the first class. So on February 24th I had vertical gastric sleeve surgery at Kaiser West LA. Since then I have lost a total of 87lbs. I am down to a size 8.
While losing weight wasn't just for looks I do like the way I look and feel about myself. Another awesome thing is I no longer have high blood pressure and am no longer a concern for diabetes. Of course all these things can change if I don't follow through with my complete lifestyle change.
Now I meal prep and exercise. Its so fun coming up with new recipes that are healthy and tasty. I love it. JD also has lost weight. And I no longer am depressed. Its just a wonderful thing to be able to get me in order. Especially now that I am pregnant.
Am so glad to hear you are doing better! I just saw your January post (didn't see it in Jan) and I ached for you. I think everyone goes through hard times, even depression and Im relieved you made it through stronger. And I am excited that you are PREGNANT!!!! Congrats!!! What a little miracle :)
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